Month: May 2017

Lessons Learned From Sake: Giving Yourself To Your Work.

There’s a rather interesting documentary currently on Netflix called The Birth of Sake. This documentary is about one of the oldest breweries in Japan that still brews sake in the old fashioned way; through a laborious method that requires the brewers to be on site for several months of the year with only two days off a month. Watching this documentary I was deeply moved because these men really gave themselves to their work, and despite the harshness of their endeavors made something with their own hands. I won’t share any more about the documentary because I’m hoping you watch it for yourselves, but what I will say is that as I grow older and feel myself becoming a cog in the corporate machine I sincerely respect the men and women that truly give themselves to work they believe in. They tirelessly expend all their energy to the tasks assigned to them and ultimately come out cleansed from it. Maybe we’re missing something if we don’t have that same drive.

Before I go any further with this conversation let me first say this, I do not believe in working for any entity that drains your spirit, life force, or morality. I wouldn’t give myself to work that doesn’t align with what I am, not for any amount of money, though selling out is super appealing at times like when the car payment or rent is due (great times to sell out). There is something beautiful in working and believing in what you do. Now, that being said I’m not naive enough to think that our society would run without society’s “downtrodden” functioning as the cogs. Hey that’s capitalism. However, it is my humble opinion that we should try our best to buck that system. The reality is that if we all could focus on what we were most passionate about and really give ourselves to it that humanity would truly be epic, and maybe we could evolve past the social limitations we’ve created to keep certain people (Yep, you know who I’m talking about) away from access to a comfortable lifestyle.

Life is too short for ___________________. It’s this statement that has always been a cliche, but be that as it may its never lost its validity. Life inevitably will come to an end for us all one day, and while some of us are content to wait in line. I don’t want to wait for my death on baited breath. I want it to find me enjoying my life doing what I love. For me, it’s writing. I want to write with such a vigor and vitality that years from now my work ethic will be studied to give some other dreamer the permission to exceed.

Quick side note: there’s a paper on my work desk right now with a breakdown of famous artist’s creativity. When they slept, when they created, when they did work for other people, etc. It didn’t help me, but looking at does inspire me to get on my own clock.

Like the men in the documentary I want to give myself to the writing and truly face it head on no matter the consequences. So, with that being said I’ll be introducing some new things to the site. Like pictures, yep we’re shedding some light in here, videos, and a plethora of other dreams I’ve a been patiently waiting to unleash on the masses. Starting next week something new will be dropping.

自業自得

“Work of self, obtainment of self.”

T.L.

Passin’ Me By: A Lesson in Confidence & Dating.

The Pharcyde’s Passin’ Me By from the album Bizarre Ride II the Pharcyde is one of those songs that most men can definitely recognize and vibe with because we’ve all taken that “L.” You know the “L” I’m talking about, that one where you may have stepped up to a woman and got the mean swerve, that one where you didn’t even have the gas to give it a real shot and you rejected the shot before it even left your fingertips, or that one where you confidently stepped up and that shot just couldn’t and didn’t sink. We as men have all been there, hell it’s a rite of passage in my opinion. If you haven’t experienced any such losses (yeah L’s are losses in this instance just in case you didn’t know. I won’t tell.) I have serious doubts about your game; you’re looking unfamiliar right now.

I too have taken shots, and Lord knows all of them have not gone in. I’ve made some down right ugly shots, I’ll admit it if you won’t. Even to this day despite the semi-woke charisma I wield I shoot and it doesn’t always go in. Such is life. Speaking of missed shots let’s talk about a massive L I took and the lesson I learned from it. Hooray, story time.

INT: Dimly Lit Concert Hall, Night

It’s Lit. Two boozy whiskeys and a tequila sangria in and I’m buzzing. My co-workers convinced me to go to a free weekday concert and it was a great idea. The liquor and the vibe had found me and invited me to chill and I wasn’t saying no. So as we head to the back of the venue a woman of cosmic brilliance graces the stage. Her voice was like Amel Larrieux, and her vibe was Groove Theory’s Tell Me on repeat after three shots of the vice of your choice and a slow dance on a moonlit rooftop. Yes, she was beauty personified… She was bad and without rivals. I was mesmerized, not just because she was attractive but because there was just something there. What can I say, I love women that can sing. Anyway, after her set she stepped off stage and walked around the crowd. Of course I wanted to immediately shoot every shot in my arsenal when she came in my direction. So when my co-worker started talking about how great her music was I was ready. I smile, open my mouth and I promise you absolutely nothing comes out. And I do mean nothing. She’s smiling back expecting words and I was dead in the water. Needless to say she says her goodbyes to my coworker and smiles again at me before walking off into the dark room.

Now this was totally a L I could return from, or so I told myself. So I stepped outside and collected myself. I gave myself the hype speech of the century and completely invoked the spirit of Liquid courage to assist. Mid speech she comes outside and starts a loose conversation with some other concert goers. Fully hyped I await that conversational lapse and I approach her, “Hey, I really vibe with your music. What’s your name?” Hella basic I know, but it was a game time decision. It worked and she smiles:
Quick side note, if her smile alone makes you think “fuck it, if I pull her I’m out the game” she’s next level bad.
Despite the game winning pep talk I’d given myself I still was flopping. I end up getting her stage name and IG completely blowing the open lay up. At this point my soul leaped out my body and handed me a glowing “L” as it walked me back inside. It was a pain to experience an a even bigger pain to mentally reenact for y’all. It gets more painful because I spent the rest of the night in the cut staring in full creep mode at her (rookie mistake) trying to find some way to make one final shot before the buzzer. When the concert is over and the venue empties I tried to make one last Hail Mary play. It’s just me and her we lock eyes. As I approach again she takes a mean Boobie Miles, Willie Beamen cut hard to the right and goes straight to this old man who’s definitely apart of the stage crew not even acknowledging the hello leaving my mouth. And it was at that point I realized there was no coming back. I leave defeated and legit regretting my lameness.

And….SCENE!

This L taught me a lot about myself, as most L’s in life do. Particularly it made me realize the level of confidence I have when it comes to the women I’m comfortable approaching. That thought alone sat me down and made me think. I can say without any hesitation that if she had been a solid 7, or hell even a 7.5 I would have been in rare form but the fact that I perceived her so much higher than me and my skills without any knowledge of who she was, what she was like, or even a tiny bit of understanding about her personality really hit me.

In the mental conversations that followed I came face to face with my own insecurities. Somewhere in my development I gave myself a level that I was comfortable with completely capping my achievement not just with beautiful women, but in life. I don’t remember the conversation or the internal dialogue but it happened and it still influences me.

Now you all may not have anchors in the same places, but I think we all have limited our potential somewhere in our lives. Think about it, what are you comfortable with? A cushy corporate job/career instead of the hard fought one creative you’ve been secretly dreaming about, your weight, your partner, etc. What have you subconsciously accepted to be your limit?

Our experiences and society will often dictate set limits on you that you can either accept silently or loudly rebel against. Don’t keep yourself grounded on Earth when there’s so much space above you. Choose your own limits and base them solely on where and when you want to stop not on some subconscious insecurity a version of you years ago decided was safe.
Remember, it’s not until humans stopped hugging the shoreline that we discovered new lands. Follow your own stars and chart your own courses.

T.L.

Savages, An Observation In Two Parts: Part I

It’s warm out and it’s only getting hotter, so you know what that means. Savage season is upon us. If this is news to you sit down brothers and sisters. Class is in session, let’s begin.

Lesson One: What is a Savage?
In our more barbarian days savages were considered to be any uncivilized culture that wasn’t dignified or failed repress their inhibitions according to British colonial standards. Of course this was based on a shoddy English culture at the time, but certain sentiments still ring true. The modern savage is uncivilized and doesn’t adhere to the societal norms that many of us have bought into. They’re hedonist and have little shame in disclosing that fact. Add in some warm weather and we’ve a recipe for a disaster. Now I say disaster not because savages are terrible (savages are people too!), but simply put they don’t give a fuck. Savages are most likely to embrace the freedom of summer love and never look back. Typically they’re the ones out and about entertaining any and all suitors without disregard until they’re no longer appealing. Need some examples? Rihanna (She did tell you she was a savage), John Mayer (the settled savage), Drake, Future, oh and JaRule (Fyre festival was hella savage, but in a more literal sense).
Savages are all about enjoying the here and now while they can, I mean you don’t know what tomorrow brings right?
Lesson Two: Discerning A Savage
Savages, like their distant relative the fuck boy have many tells that speak before shit hits the fan. Can’t pick them out of a line up yet? This should help:
1) Savages typical have pain in their wake.
Bad relationships happen, more often than we’d like to acknowledge. Sometimes it’s our fault and other times it’s not. All kinds of things can happen. A savage however typically got there due to bad relationships and rarely ever arrived there by mutual circumstances. Life and relationships took away their ability to care about most things so savagery was the only thing left to them, and they’re good at it. Ages 22-33 typically denote the savage demographic. These individuals are super down, and super ready to cause some trouble. {Disclaimer: there’s nothing wrong with that, but with great power comes great responsibility.}

Savages aren’t bad, until you challenge them
Savages aren’t necessarily bad but what they are is super cognizant that they have little to no fucks to give. Imagine for a moment that you spent your last fuck and there wouldn’t be another shipment till next week, and all that’s left is a few sparse crumbs from last weeks fucks. Think of the energy you wouldn’t spend doing things you don’t care about. You’d be in a state of semi-hedonism as time went on and with it would come a sort of peace, well until somebody tried it. Yes, your near zen like experience would come to a screeching halt because someone made the mistake of issuing a challenge; this is when a savage is most dangerous.

In any challenge scenario the person who cares the least about the outcomes rules. Morality, consideration, and caring can all be tossed if caring isn’t in the cards. So tread lightly. A challenge to a savage tends to be mostly sexual or emotional in nature. Showing interest in savagery is always acceptable and isn’t a challenge. There’s no danger in talking to the savage in attempt to soothe their barbarian soul. What is dangerous, however, is to engage them on a purely sexual level (they will engage and not a single emotional connection will be made), play around or poorly handle their emotions, or ineffectively swerve them.
When you recognize a savage, by their little to no fucks, don’t make the mistake of engaging them unless you too are down for reckless abandon.

Let it be said…
Ladies, despite the intentions of Rihanna and her music it is nearly impossible to out savage a man. I don’t mean this to say that you can’t be a savage because you all truly can, however, you cannot match the savageness of a man. The depth that men can plunge to during savage season is the reason why Adele’s 21, Beyonce’s Lemonade, any Rihanna song, and Ciara’s relationship with Russell Wilson (Future’s savagery still looms over them) are held with such esteem because behind them all was a man with no fucks to give. Pettiness and savagery are two totally different extremes, but we’ll discuss that in more detail in our next observation.
So brave souls, remember, in in the wilds don’t feed the savages.

Keeping Them Honest: An Open Letter To Readership.

Dear Readers,

Alright, it’s time to fall on my sword. I have been a terrible writer and blogger who writes here sporadically and without regard for you all. I own that. My eyes have been off the prize of being a writer, and truth be told I miss the hell out of it.

Recently I asked God a question, “what do I need to focus on?” The answer was much louder than I expected. I don’t know if you believe in a higher power, the existence of a sentient universe, or the laws of attraction, but the age old sentiment is true: be careful what you ask for. Man. These last few weeks have given me clarity and peace about everything but my writing. It’s the one part of my life that irks me consistently, the thorn in my paw if you will. I began writing because it allowed me to be a person I couldn’t be in real life: myself. I spent a lot of time when I was younger being the person everyone else needed me to be, and it was exhausting. My writing was the only place I was free to be who I wanted to be. Eventually, my life caught up and I could finally be me. I didn’t write much after that because I was too busy living the life I never had. You know what though, that nagging feeling to write never left. I remember hearing that your passion should bother you, and if it isn’t fulfilled it should nag until it’s completed. My writing, my plans for this site, and my plans for myself honestly stay on my mind annoyingly often. Add some work related nonsense here and there and you, my friend, have a recipe for a mental exhaustion.

Lately I’ve been doing a terrible job of balancing life and passion, and for that I sincerely apologize. The entire point of being a low-life never was to be a real lowlife. I started this blog because I wanted to make and show art. I’ve definitely missed the mark, so I make a solemn vow to do better and be better.

As it stands here’s the plan, feel free to hold me to it, every Thursday I’ll be posting some content. Every other day is a total free for all and I will write whatever’s clever. There’s a plan, chaotic though it be, to change this site into something. It’s taken me a while to get to this place, but for what it’s worth I’m kind of happy about it. Life moves you forward if you let it and I’m riding the wave.

I appreciate your patience with me and ask that you keeping reading. I promise to make it worth your while.

Sincerely,

T.L.